The Year Of…

 

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Every December since freshman year of college, I’ve been partaking in a blogging/writing journey called Project Reverb. Though format and methods have changed over the years, the concept of reflecting and manifesting still remains the same. It has become one of my favorite things during this month, and I hope you’ll join me on the journey.

It was the first time in a long time that I wasn’t angry, that my soul wasn’t being saturated by pain and frustration over things I could not control. It was the year that I lost a job, met some pretty amazing people, watched my brother graduate college (from the Air Force Academy, no less), crossed off a long-time bucket list item, experienced a painful tragedy, witnessed history on multiple occasions, and never stopped learning in the process. Much was welcomed with open arms, while every so often I had to grit my teeth and press on in what felt like a tangled up mess. It was eye-opening, liberating, life-changing, and unexpected in every way. I normally can’t predict what the future holds (and most of the time I don’t even try), but I’m serious when I say that I did not see any of it coming.

At first I would have called it a cluster, a little bit of this and a little bit of that. Sometimes it feels like a breakaway from old patterns and habits, giving me a sense of comfort in my skin and with my history. A lot of it is ultimately indescribable because I’m still processing and taking it all in. Seeds were planted, steps were taken, and something tells me that this is only the beginning.

I’m not one for picking a singular word until my birthday, but if nothing else I’d like it to be a continuation of positive change and growth. So often I’ve looked at the upcoming New Year as a time to start over, to put all my mistakes behind me and try again; and while there’s nothing wrong with that as a whole, I want to make sure that I also focus on celebrating where I’m and what I’ve accomplished. I’ve come a long way over the last year, and while there’s still room for improvement, I don’t want to get caught up in the hoopla of trying too hard.

Maybe I want to just be: Be content. Be grateful. Be aware. Be me. Yet, I also want to never go without being hungry for new adventures and experiences.

 

It is well, and so am I.

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