What quote resonated with you in 2013?
“There are a lot of things in life that are going to break your heart, but you should never let them break your spirit!”
I’m not sure when or where exactly I came up with these words; I think I was writing in my journal one summer morning and all of the sudden it just popped into my head. It has been very much a reflection of this year as a whole, at least in terms of how I’ve felt about about it. On one hand, there has been a lot of pain, mostly in regards of the big moments. There were days where I would just lay in my bed at home or sit on my couch at my apartment and cry or stare into space. I felt so hallow on the inside, like I was in between a nightmare and reality. It was pretty much like being in The Twilight Zone.
Everyone has a different way of mourning; there’s no one right method of expressing pain, anger, etc. But there comes a point for me when it becomes exhausting. If I’m like that all the time, I start to wonder if it’s actually doing more harm than good. I believe that when bad things happen or tragedy strikes, you should allow yourself to feel and process all that’s going on. But at what point do you begin to accept your new normal? At what point do you risk being destroyed by what you can’t change?
I’m not saying lock it in a closet and pretend it never happened. There are always going to be certain events, words, and/or periods of time that are going to stay with you forever, no matter how much time goes by. But that doesn’t mean you can’t let yourself have moments of bliss or happiness. It doesn’t mean that you can’t be happy, while still being aware of the fact that you’ve got a broken heart.
And that’s the thing: awareness of one thing but still allowing yourself to feel another if it comes on. I can’t base my happiness on whether or not the people around me are happy, though it does affect me to an extent. I don’t want to miss out on so many other blessings because I could only focus on the negatives.
Don’t try to find the balance; rather, maintain it.
photo credit: seyed mostafa zamani via photopin cc