On My Mind: Digesting And Managing

This is the busiest semester I’ve had thus far, if not the busiest year. Don’t get me wrong, I like that I’m not constantly sitting around and ultimately having too much time on my hands. And if I’m not doing stuff for school, I usually have something going on in terms of extra curricular activities every single night, except Thursdays and Fridays. 

School work consists of reading anywhere from fifty to a hundred pages per day, and that’s not always for one singular class. Depending on the week, I’ll have one or multiple essays/papers that I have to write. While doing all that, I’m currently taking on an internship writing articles and distributing social media content geared toward college students. 

It can be exhausting, more on an emotional level than physical. My brain tends to shut down after looking at a computer screen for ridiculously long periods of time, so I can’t necessarily plow through everything at once. I get overwhelmed a lot because it’s easy to envision getting everything done, but not so easy to actually do it. 

The key thing isn’t necessarily prioritizing, but knowing when to work and when to take a break. Since I still deal with depressive thoughts, it’s important for me to make time to do things that make me feel good and I’m not just doing it out of obligation. If I don’t, I start feeling incredibly lonely and frustrated with life. 

That being said, it was liberating to say that a lot of those feeling stemmed from over analyzing how people see me. In the days following that post, I realized that I don’t have to share everything with everybody, especially when it comes to social media. It’s not about a lack of honesty or authenticity, but still maintaining a sense of privacy. Just because you have the ability and opportunity to display your life all over cyberspace doesn’t mean you have to, or should, for that matter. 

My spring break is coming to an end, and I’ll be headed back to campus soon.  It was bittersweet, given the recent news of another death of someone I knew from my hometown (the fifth one out of the last year and a half). However, it has motivated me to mend fences with some broken relationships, and I also genuinely cherished the time I got to spend with my family and take it easy.

With so much going on, life can be crazy. But that’s what happens as you get older; free time becomes a commodity, and it’s something that you have to work at in order to have. In retrospect, things are really looking up for me, and I’m grateful to God for the opportunities to learn and grow.

I’m taking it all in. I’m being. I’m living. And I happen to like it like that.

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