Day 10-Speak Less
I have not done a whole lot of writing this summer, aside from blogging. There have been so many emotions, feelings and thoughts swirling around in my brain. From fictional story ideas to personal observations to poetry, it’s all there. Yet I haven’t really taken the time to get it all down, even in my private journal. It’s not that I haven’t had the time, energy, or even things to write about; it’s actually a rarity for me to be at a loss for topics or ideas.
There are two things that I always try to include in my writing: the first is elements of my own personality or certain experiences, if such applies. The second is a level of vulnerability and truth; when I write, I usually don’t like to hold anything back, whether or not that concept pertains to language/word usage, opinions, etc. The way I see it, if you put a rein on yourself when you write, you’re defeating the purpose of writing. And that purpose is to speak and to use your voice, regardless if you’re trying to teach a lesson or just get something off of your chest.
With that being said, it is important to be mindful of the fact that our words may come across as hurtful, and even more important to be considerate of how others might be effected by it. This is something that I will most definitely elaborate on that more in my next entry. When I say “don’t hold yourself back” when writing, I mean don’t over-think about whether or not it will be considered “good.” Personally, I tend to over think things before I even get them down on paper.
But there are times when the idea of being vulnerable scares the crap out of me, regardless if it’s in person or in writing. I consider myself an open and honest person, with little to hide at that. Yet, laying all the cards out all the table can be jarring; until you say something, there’s no way of knowing how someone will genuinely react to it.
For instance, there is a specific topic that I’ve be wanting to blog about for quite some time, but haven’t been sure as to how to introduce it. Whenever there would be media coverage on it, I felt a push to write about, yet never felt like I was ready.
In terms of fictional pieces, most of the time the following questions go through my head: is this storyline/plot believable? Has this been done already? What can I do to make this story unique? They’re good questions for any writer to ask, but are exhausting at the same time. A big part of me thinks it would be better to wait until I got back to school.
And as far as my own personal thoughts? Maybe I just don’t want to admit that I’m feeling a certain way about what’s going on in my life. There are times where I would rather suck it up than rather break down and say that I’m not doing good. Not to mention I become easily distracted when I’m journaling and eventually get a hand cramp from writing so much.
That’s not healthy at all.
My only answer is this: What people are often afraid to say are the things that need to be said; and the longer you hold it in, the more damage you’re doing to yourself.
Side question: does anyone else experience that kind of problem/difficulty?
Day 10-Speak Less