Stream of Consciousness #5

Classes were cancelled today, thank goodness!! Yesterday marked my nineteenth year of life, as well as one of the biggest and most dangerous snowstorms that the midwest has experienced in the last couple of years or so. Mom and Dad braved the mayhem and drove up to see me for the day. We had lunch at one of the downtown eateries and than did some grocery shopping before opening presents in my dorm room. Unfortunately my friends and I had to bypass eating out due to the weather, but that’s in the process of being rescheduled. 

Up until yesterday, I confess that I’ve felt pretty down and out as of late. A lot of it had to do with this past weekend and what happened (or didn’t happen) from Friday to Sunday. I knew that with all things considered, I had no one to really blame but myself; my grades for last semester just weren’t good enough. Nevertheless, going through that kind of rejection once again wasn’t easy. 

It wasn’t so much about getting in than it was wondering to myself, “where do I go from here? What do I have to look forward to now that it’s all said and done?” 

I wanted to talk to someone about it; but as it usually goes with me, most of the time I have no idea how to bring it up. And what was the point of bringing it up if there was absolutely nothing I could do about it?

At least that’s how I was feeling until yesterday. 

I didn’t really view turning nineteen as something that would be all that special; you aren’t really given any sort of new privileges nor is it seen as typical “milestone” age. But it was special in a not-so-typical way. 

My parents drove a hundred plus miles in a severe and dangerous snowstorm just to be with me on my birthday. After lunch we decided to do a little grocery shopping and while running through the wind and the snow my Mom is yelling “Alyx, I love you!” repeatedly. (She was more or less trying to remind herself why she did this when everyone else back home told her that she was crazy). Meanwhile, I’m laughing hysterically as usual. 
After dinner I was studying for a little bit and happened to run into a friend that I hadn’t talked to in awhile; it was nice catching up despite that I had made very little progress with actually studying. And it’s even more nice when someone is willing to let you hug them for no particular reason, even though at that point I really did need a hug. 

Back at the dorm, we celebrated with eating cupcakes in the middle of the hallway, taking random pictures and just goofing around. There was a moment where I thought to myself, “Look around you and what you’ve been given. You may not have certain things right now, but what you do have is incredibly special. Cherish what’s right in front of you and take the rest as it comes.” 

To cap the night off, a bunch of us went out and had a spontaneous romp in a record-breaking blizzard. A bit insane? Yes. But that’s what college is: a bunch of things that you probably shouldn’t do, yet you do anyway. 

It was definitely a birthday to remember.

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